You sat in the center seat on an airplane and ten minutes into the flight the people in the aisle and window seats left.
Your kid's birthday present looked a lot like a product sample.
Your spouse's anniversary present has the name of a hotel on it.
You turned in an expense report and found yourself trying to convince your manager that your customer has a 900 number.
Your vacation involved your spouse working a booth.
You had to pay $20 for a club sandwich from room service.
You used pictures of your wife and kids to shame a customer into signing a purchase order.
Your fellow employees applauded upon learning that you had laryngitis.
You walk through the mall and find yourself on the screen at the video camera display and you stop, stare and smile and yell, Hey, everybody, look at this!
Anyone ever said, Have we met before?, and you answered, No. If we had met before you would have remembered me.
You can recognize the source of the meat in an airline meal.
You cannot recognize the source of the moldy food in the bottom of your attach case.
You've ever wondered why more people cannot be more like you.
Your friends have a tendency to grab their wallets when they see you coming.
You bought an electronic organizer to help you become more organized and you cannot find it.
You think the best way to start a meeting is, Here, have another doughnut.
You ever blamed losing a sale on UFO's or aliens.
Your boss has a tendency to begin meetings with you by holding up their hand and saying, I don't want to hear it.
Your customer has a tendency to begin meetings with you by holding up their hand and saying, I don't want to hear it.
The register in your checkbook has never been used.
The last time you cleaned off your desk, disco music was popular.
Your score in Space Fighters has continued to improve since your company gave you a notebook computer.
You can make coffee in the office coffee maker blindfolded.
Your expense report has ever been nominated for a Pulitzer Prize in fiction.
You ever used Libyan terrorists as an excuse for being late to a meeting.
You took product samples to your high school reunion.
You ever made a sales presentation to an unidentified person in the next stall in a public rest room.
You think Business Casual includes swim wear.
You can drive a stick shift with a cellular phone in one hand and your appointment book in the other.
You are turned on by a member of the opposite sex who can overcome the price objection.
You secretly envy men who can wear gold chains, white shoes and belts and not feel self conscious.
You're on a first name basis with a morning waitress at a coffee shop near your office.
You ever began preparing a major presentation after midnight the night before the meeting.
The cable company sends someone out to disconnect your service for nonpayment and you wind up selling them a set of pots and pans.
You ever tried selling Mary Kay products to a nun.
You ever trashed product catalogs to make more room for trophies on your shelf.
You ever felt rejected because your company's annual report did not feature your picture on the cover.
You have more than 50 business cards of unfamiliar people and you have no idea why.
You ever used a palm reader to write your sales plan.
It ever took you more than thirty minutes to answer the customer's question, How was your weekend?
You ever found yourself alone on one side of a crowded fishing boat.
You ever mentioned a spiff during a eulogy.
You have never listened to a sales training tape all the way through.
You ever took customers on a plant tour and they learned more about your golf game than your company.
You were ever snowed in at an airport and you organized luggage cart races.
You ever did a product demonstration for a monk.
You ever pulled a D&B on a dinner guest.
Your spouse has ever said, Move your computer, printer, attach, popcorn, candy wrappers and TV remote so we can go to bed.
If there are more trophies and plaques on your desk than files.
You ever did a product demo in a traffic jam.
You have ever wondered what those envelopes full of checks the bank sends you every month are all about.
Every employee suggestion you ever submitted had something to do with music or recreational equipment.
You were doing a product demo when any of your children were born.
You swapped product samples for your spouse's wedding ring.
The people you work with lock up their pencils and leave proprietary company documents unlocked.
The Easter Bunny ever saw your Christmas tree.
You still have something polyester secretly hidden in your closet and you wear it when no one is around.
You ever drove around a BRIDGE OUT barricade just to see.
You never have to leave early for appointments because you know a shortcut.
Your favorite Christmas present was a mirror.
You ever double dog dared a customer to buy from a competitor.
Your good deed for the day was not parking in your manager's reserved space.
You ever tried to convince your boss that the only available rental cars were convertibles.
You find many admirable qualities in Herb Tarlick, WKRP.
Your child took a product sample to school for show and tell and covered the features, benefits, delivery intervals and credit terms from memory.
You ever tried to convince operations that manufacturing schedules were really just suggestions.
You enclosed a product brochure with your Christmas cards.
You look at a parentteacher conference as an opportunity to expand your downline.
You ever considered driving a carnival bumper car as a travel expense.
You ever gave a toll booth operator a product brochure.
There is more food on your tie than on your plate.
If most of your social contacts answer to names like Bambi and Rock.
Your expense report itemization column simply has two words, trust me.
If a cab driver ever asked you how many receipts you wanted and you said, All of them.
If your idea of a power breakfast is a hangover remedy.
If you know 20 different ways to give a high five.
If you have a large collection of hotel shoe shine mitts and none of them has ever been used.
If you ever said, I'd sell a lot more if I just had decent leads.
If you ever said to a customer, Actually, I'd love to see pictures from your vacation.
If you have missed more than four sales meetings to attend a grandparent's funeral.
